13 Stories from Driver’s Who’ve Seen Some Shit.
Literally.
Typically, rest stops are quiet places where long haul drivers can go to lay their heads. But most people don’t realize that there is a lot going down at truck stops across the nation. Drivers are the ones who see and experience a lot of what goes on around those parts. And they’ve certainly got some stories to tell…
Police thought it was a jokePolice Thought it Was a Joke
“It was about early fall in 1994 on I-40.
There was 7 of us (Trucks running together) eastbound at about 89-90 M.P. I-40 I was running 3rd spot. The first truck went to the left about half a lane – as did #2, then my truck etc.
#1 asked, “Tell me y’all saw what I did!”
#2 said, “What you think y’all saw?”
On down the line behind us each truck goes in the other lane and then line back up. We all were running tight. I responded that I saw “IT”. It was what appeared to be the left shoulder clod, arm, wearing a red checked pendleton. You were able see that there was raw meat/ flesh visible.
We talked amongst us and decided to stop at the 102 at that little store/laundry & fuel store -a real gem. There we saw a resident cop and informed him…
He radios NMDOT and 45- 60min later they arrive and we tell them (what we saw) as well. Remember here are 7 produce trucks that have to be out yonder yesterday! NMDOT implies a driver conspiracy against the New Mexico DOT! Give me a f*&king break! They coordinated a search party combined reservation cops and New Mexico DOT. One officer stayed with us while the search commenced. About two hours later they show back up after looking between the 75 mile post and the 102 mile post. The lead officer who and where is it Captain with the New Mexico DOT or state patrol whatever they were stated that the search was inconclusive and that we were we playing games. Seven trucks (2 1/2 hours later) all of us going to the east and wasting that much time to have fun?! Yeah right.
One driver mouth off to the officer and said ”What The f*&k you going to do arrest us for, armed robbery?”
At that point I had to get out of there so I didn’t laugh. And the officers face! That was the funniest damn thing I’ve ever heard anybody say for a long time!
Over the next couple years I ran across a few of those guys and we discuss the situation over the radio and still to this day cannot figure out what it was. Besides a human arm and shoulder clod!
Anyway it’s a true story and I shared it with a few people in my lifetime and now with technology I’m able to share it with you all.” – Kenneth Green
Rest Stop KeeperThe Rest Stop Keeper
“Pulled up to a rest stop in central Utah. A young man was sitting by the restroom doors in a plastic lawn chair holding a long handled axe.” – Debra Fraser
Leave it to SwiftLeave it to Swift
“I forgot about the Swift truck I stopped coming out of the Petro in Reddick Florida. He ran over a light pole on one of those concrete bases. He drug the trailer axles out from under the trailer and was heading out the drive. I pulled in front of him to stop him and he looked at me like I was stupid. When I finally got him to look in the mirror his expression was priceless. Especially when he realized HE was the dumbass. He was scratching his head wondering where he lost his axles! His eyes sure got big when he seen them setting upon the concrete and the light pole on the ground. I pointed him in the right direction to look. He said that he didn’t even know that he hit the pole! When I left, he was trying to back up into the parking lot. Quite entertaining. The drag marks in the pavement made a big question mark. Even the parking lot was wondering WTF?” – Ralph Moore
Retired LizardRetired Lizard?
“Mississippi rest area, saw a guy (70-80ish) walking around his car wearing a thong, stockings, and a bra!” –Anderson Lemuel Newsome
Mormon Crickets
“A rest area in Nevada was completely overrun with Mormon crickets. They were smashed in the parking lot, in the road, and in the stalls of the restroom, just everywhere!” – Caryn Feeney
She Don’t Date JB Hunt DriversShe Don’t Date JB Hunt Drivers
A J B Hunt driver trying to get a date with me. He tried to stand between me and my truck so I told him if he could keep up with me for the mile I had left to run – I would go out with him. I lost him before I got into high range. – Suzan P Lambert-Bell
That Oughtta Fix ItThat Oughtta Fix It
“Stopped at a truck stop in Washington State. The toilet seat was broken and they had duct tapped it together” – Patrick Gomer Roberson
Free Bl*w JobsFree Bl*w Jobs
I was on the NY thruway several years ago. I pulled off at the last parking area before exit 21A for the Mass pike. At the time I was running a recurring shuttle from Syracuse NY to Augusta ME so I stopped there a lot. It was generally very quiet and a great place to get off the road a minute and kick the tires. This particular time though, there was a white van with Massachusetts plates parked at the beginning of the lot. As I passed he pulled out a sign that said ‘free bl*w jobs’ (as if price were the reason I don’t let dudes suck my dick). I try not to judge people too much, so I figured if I parked all the way at the other end of the parking lot, as far away from his vehicle as I could than he’d know I wasn’t into the same things as him. I don’t care who he blows really, just as long as it isn’t me. He drove up to the other end in front of me and put his 4 ways on, then honked his horn. I left, he followed me on the highway for several miles and then sped past me and flipped me the bird. From the way he behaved, I have to assume he’s a Patriots fan. Probably a Red Sox fan too.” –Shawn Rutherford
ScalpedScalped
I was once in a SW state and a man had been scalped. He said he was hog tied and beaten up by a gang. The left half of him was a bloody mess. He didn’t wanna tell me what he provoked to get that ass whooping. But it must have been really bad.” – Hector Rico
Poetry
Walked into an old “76” truck stop. Recently renovated, the bathroom were painted and gleaming white. On the stall in indelible pocket knife these words, “They paint these walls to stop my pen, but the shit house poet Rides Again” – Charles Jones
Nice TryNice Try
“A couple years ago down in Mississippi off I-59, I was sitting in a small truck stop on a Sunday morning before dawn. Two local city squad cars pull up, chick gets out on and starts roaming the lot. She made it to my truck, told me that she’d make me “very happy”; to which I replied “not today officer”. She replied that she wasn’t a cop. I pointed at the two squads parked within eyesight. Then I told her that I saw her get out of one of them. She quickly bid me ado and left me alone. Nice looking chick too!”
Rest Stop Voting BoothA Rest Stop Voting Booth
“South Dakota has a toilet dispenser with etching votes. There was ‘column A’ : Hillary for jail, ‘column B’: not for jail. There was 35+ strikes for jail and 14 against!” – Matthew Wlasitz
Watch Out for the CrabsWatch Out for the Crabs
“Writing on the wall “please don’t throw toothpicks in toilet. The crabs around here can pole vault” –Stephen Strom Strong
So there you have it folks. It’s a mad world out there.
For more crazy Tales from the Trip, be sure to check out the time we asked drivers about their best lot lizard stories.